Don't hold your breath

I moved a couple months ago, and had DSL at my prior residence through Earthlink. Naturally, when I moved, I was a little concerned that DSL would not be available in my new area. But I said to myself ‘It’s central Denver. The Qwest building with the blue logo you can see for 30 miles around is just down the street. You’re fine.’

And the Earthlink site thought so, too.

So weeks go by. A month. Two months. No response from Covad or Mindspring or Earthlink telling me when my service was going to be installed. So I called them up, and asked why no one had contacted me about my order. ‘Your order was cancelled, sir.’ Okay, why? ‘Because all of our circuits in your neighborhood have been used up.’ So what can I do? ‘ Try another ISP, or resubmit your DSL order in 90 days.’ So I thanked him (especially for the free Earthlink dialup service I’d been receiving, which he promptly ‘fixed’ for me), and said I’d try another service provider. I broke down and called Qwest up. They told me they could install it, they’re just not sure when. So I wait. Yesterday, I get a call from Qwest letting me know that my order has been put on hold, because ALL THE CIRCUITS in my neighborhood are being used. Mother fuckers. I hate this bullshit. So I’m stuck on dialup for who-knows-how-long, until basically, someone else cancels their service. But, as we all know, to get DSL you usually have to sign lengthy contracts. Fuck them. Does anyone know of any alternative broadband solutions that aren’t cable or DSL (AT&T doesn’t have cable modem service in my area, either)?

NetWeed

Okay. So you know how NetFlix.com will send DVDs to your door? Well, We-Deliver.tv is kinda like that. Only it’s not DVDs, and the merchandise is coming from The Netherlands. Check out how they get away with it:


Now once it’s in the U.S., a post office worker might get it in they head to inspect a package like this since it look a little odd. And they are allowed to make sure it ain’t a bomb or something that could hurt a postal worker. But they ain’t allowed to open it up because of a very specifically worded commenticius clause in the U.S. Postal Inspection Code that say all inspectors are “prohibited from the internal examination of any package containing the remains of a human whose life be deemed legally and prematurely ended from without the borders of the United States, its commonwealths, protectorates and air space thereof, blah, blah, blah…”

So they send you the ‘remains’ of a loved one, with the package brandishing the appropriate warnings and codes. Only, when you open up the box, you find that they made a mistake, and shipped you something else that’s legal in The Netherlands….

*Note: If you try this and get caught, Alternate.org is in no way, shape, or form responsible for your actions.

Something to Ponder

I know this is a bit late but something to ponder…

Why do people have the perspective of Cesar Chavez as being exploited in this ad and not the other figures Apple has used in this particular advertising campaign? (Many of those figures are deceased as well.)

hmm…

A little anxious?

A four track promo CD for Radiohead’s new Amnesiac album has appeared on Ebay. Starting bid? $175.00. Pretty cool collectors item, but I’m just not in that big a hurry. All of the songs are going to be available for about $14 in a few months anyways.

X response

This post is in response to a post on SVN regarding MacOS X:


Sick of the OS X hype…
Yes, I am inviting a flaming deluge of comments here, but at least hear me out before you start writing back in ALL CAPS.
There are two things about the swarm of commentary on OS X among the Mac faithful that have me scratching my head.
The first:

Mac OS X is the future!

It might be the future for MacOS users, but to the rest of the computing world it’s old news. Ah yes, an OS that doesn’t crash once a day — let us all exult at the revolution! An OS that has support for more than one processor — by Zeus, my world has changed. An OS based on the tried and true UNIX (which is itself 20 years old), if that’s not a revolution, I don’t know what is! Now that brings me to my second point of confusion. I’ve read some form of the following in many a message board:

Unix is inside Mac OS X. It’s here to stay. That is a GOOD thing.

Why? Since when did UNIX become the only possible option in OS foundations? Yes, it certainly is stable and well understood, but what’s with this blind devotion to this very old technology. I’m disappointed that in the seventeen years since the release of the first version of what is now the MacOS Apple hasn’t come up with something better, particalarly considering the fact that Apple controls the entire widget (software and hardware). Jobs says that he wants OS X to be the foundation for the MacOS for the next fifteen years. If that’s the case I’ll be very bummed out because that would mean that very little of substance will have changed in the world of computing.

Here’s my point (which I’ve been slow in getting to), the current computing paradigm sucks. OS UIs are lame and OS X doesn’t do much to change that (prettier control widgets don’t cut it in my book). If that’s the best that they could muster then why not just develop skins for Windows 2000 or Linux?

Millions and millions of people have changed their behaviour and learned to cope with stupidly designed interfaces that force us to jump through the same hoops again and again and again and again. That needs to change if the real potential of the human/computer interface is to be realized, yet all anyone seems to be paying attention to is re-skinning existing interfaces and increasing MHz.

Why am I criticizing Apple? It may be unfair since Microsoft certainly does not seem to be doing anything better with Windows XP, but what do you expect from MS? What we’ve all come to expect from Apple is real change and OS X has been billed as a “revolutionary” product. Instead what Apple has delivered is an incrementally evolutionary product that has arrived about seven years later than it should have. Hey, no doubt that it’ll eventually be a boon to Mac users who won’t have to force reboot their computers several times a week, but it does nothing to solve the fundamental problems with current operating systems and that’s sad.

Ahem. Can I point out one small flaw in just what just about everyone is saying? I know at least one of the Signals crew disagrees with this analogy, but here goes: EK, you said yourself that UNIX is 15 years old, and that X has been in development in one form or another for 10 years. To us (computer users), that seems like a long time. But in reality, I think that expecting to see or being disappointed by not seeing ‘the future’ of the computer UI just 15 short years after its inception is wildly ridiculous. Here’s the analogy: cars. The design of the car did not significantly change 15 years after it was first designed, and in fact still hasn’t fundamentally changed, almost 100 years after its birth. What has changed? Comfort, style, & performance. Now, OSX might not have improved in comfort much yet, but in style and performance, compard to OS9, it’s off the charts. When I use classic now, I feel like I might as well be using System 6 or something… All this talk of Apple dismissing usability for creativity is, I feel, in error. Aqua is just an evolution of platinum. Were you this pissed when 7.6 or 8 came out (I can’t remember which had it) with the Aaron extension (renamed to appearance/platinum) that added nice 1px shadows and depth to windows and widgets? I doubt it, but with Aqua, everyone is up in arms that Apple is ignoring their own ideas, when that really isn’t true. I think, at least.

And one more thing: the act of getting upset with a company for distributing hype along with a new product is retarded. Sure, X isn’t the future: not yet. Apple is a company that needs to sell products in order to survive. Marketing furtheres that goal. Honestly, at this point, a true major evolution in the way humans interact with computers would not sell well, or even be regarded as such.

Ten bucks says you still won't use it

I know what you’re thinking: ‘Gee… not much going on here.. I’ll go over to a better weblog where there’s some action.”

Well, my friend, if you were to be thinking that, you’d be dead fucking wrong. Because lo and behold. there’s a new comment system installed that I built just for you. Each and every one of you. It’s Alternate.org-branded (no more BlogVoices logos and blackouts), it’s built with PHP, and we control the whole damn thing. Yipty-frickin-do. So PLEASE, for the love of god, USE IT. I busted my ass today to get that damn thing working so you’re going to comment, and you’re going to damn-well like it.

Make us money to make you money?

I guess you know your website is getting popular when you start getting the banner farmers/spammers of the net interested in your URL… I mention this because today I received an email from rankyou.com that sounded good at first but after inspection of their website and the realization of what they are and what they cost I chose to let them and the world (well, whoever reads alternate anyway) know that they are the scums of the internet that are killing small websites chances of surviving. You see, I believe that the banner farmers/spammers of the net (ie. DoubleClick.net) are the major cause for sites to jump into the world of banner ads to “support” their site.


Why is this bad you ask?


Well, if these websites didn’t have the advertising and administration overhead caused by buying into shite like DoubleClick or RankYou then they could stay alive and not need to bring in money to buy ads so they can sell ads… I mean, Its a big fucking circle jerk, one website pays to get the right to have ads sold, then another company sells those ads and takes some of the money, then the original site pays again to show those ads again…. No wonder the net and its AD supported bretheren are dying …. arghh. We for one will NOT BE A PART OF IT.



At this URL you can see the ridiculousness of the rates (5 cents per hit if less than 1 million hits per month, who the fuck gets that much traffic that cannot figure out how to make money off the site on their own??)



Here is a piece of the email that I found funny (53rd biggest, ewww, wow… and I’ve still never heard of them);


My name is xxxxxxx and I am the Sr. Advertising Executive with
Rankyou.com. Coming off February, we are currently ranked as the 53rd
largest web property in the world and own the 44th most visited site in the
world with over 14 million unique viewers last month, twistedhumor.com (PC
Data).

Now that our traffic is at an all-time high, more than ever we have that
ability to get an extremely targeted group of people over to your site via
several online marketing strategies. Being the industry leader in online
Advertising and Marketing, I would like to speak to your Director or VP of
Marketing to discuss our various online marketing strategies.

Feels like they wanna help us huh? But guess what? They dont, they want our money, period.

Assholes.

You can't mine a market that doesn't exist

From WiredNews:


Part of the reason the digital music businesses have not moved toward profitability is their reluctance to mine users for money-making opportunities because of the privacy concerns.

Oh, so that’s why they don’t make money. Huh. I thought it might have something to do with the fact that no one wants to pay for music online. I guess not. Silly me.

Jakob can suck it


Finally, to illustrate the importance for all designers to stick to HTML standards and conventions, Nielsen points to the omnipresent traffic light: “To my knowledge, there is no international standard that red means stop and green means go. But can you imagine what would happen at an intersection if someone decided to change that color convention on their own?

Yeah, great analogy, Jakob… only… to my knowledge, no one has ever DIED because of BAD WEB DESIGN. Jesus.